poms i need your advise on something. when i was studying in korea i met this guy and we were just messaging each other for about a month until we finally could hang out together. but when we finally met i only had about two weeks left but he didn't really do anything to show that much interest. he paid for everything and was an absolute gentleman but he didn't tell me liked me until i had a few days left and i realized i liked him too. we spent every second together my last 3 days ther (part 1)
and i was really upset to leave him. but now I’m home and we still talk some but its really hard with the time difference and he’s so busy all the time. Im always afraid he’s gonna just disappear without a word like the other korean guys tend to do. we haven’t really established what our relationship is like were not together or anything. but i can’t go back to korea for another year at least and i don’t want him to wait around for me when I’m here and can’t make him happy but (part 2)
but i don’t want to lose him either. he’s a dj for a few big clubs in gangnam that of course are filled with gorgeous girls all the time and that kind worries me too Im not gonna lie. plus all his friends have serious girlfriends and i feel bad he’s left out of that. i don’t want to be selfish and hold him back but I’m not ready to lose him yet. idk what to do can you help me?? you always give such great advise and feel like your a big sister i never had. sorry this is so long… (part 3)
Awe first of all thank you for saying I give good advise :D I just try to help when I can~
Honestly this might not be what you want to hear but if I were you, I would’t wait for the guy. Not because I don’t think your feelings for each other are genuine or anything, but because of the difficulty of distance. Distance is hard. It is sometimes successful of course, but it’s hard. When I had to do long distance with PB it was a nightmare and that was only three months, I can’t imagine having to do a full year. I have heard of it working, however all of the success stories have mainly been people who were in a long term relationship with the person before they separated. I honestly don’t think it’s realistic to expect to continue to talk to someone constantly and be with them and not be with anyone else for a whole year based off a relationship you had for a few days. It’s possible, of course, but not probable. Also aside from that I feel like if you waited you would be miserable and there is no point in being miserable. You’d constantly be worried about him meeting girls and what he’s doing instead of talking to you and driving yourself crazy over every unanswered text and that’s a lot of work, especially when the other person is thousands of miles away.
I’m not saying you should lose contact with him by any means. Continue to talk to him whenever you can, just don’t place all your hope into this one guy because you might end up getting very hurt and no one wants that! And don’t push away other opportunities if they arise with people who are in your home country because of the guy in Korea either. If you’re interested, go for it. Don’t feel like you have to wait. If you two end up talking consistently and getting together when you go back to Korea that’s awesome! But don’t spend all your time here just waiting around for someone who you literally will not be able to see for a year and someone you don’t even know that well. I know it may seem really hard to not put all your hope into him at first, but once time goes on and you get more used to being home, it will get a lot easier. Stay strong!! I hope that helped~
candlelight vigil to mourn the victims of sewol ferry accident and pray for the safe return of those still missing. saturday the 26th (tomorrow) at 7pm noryangjin station.
For the people who are in Korea.
there is something great about doing homework while a cute boy snoozes quietly on your shoulder
can this happen every time I have to write a paper? it’s so unbelievably comforting
What are your opinions on EYK? They are opening a coffee shop in Hongdae.
Eh I have mixed views on EYK. I talked about it more in depth in a previous post but basically I don’t think they deserve the title of horrible, disgusting people I just think they don’t understand how to act in the public eye and it’s also a problem how they aren’t willing to change or learn from the mistakes that they make.
It’s also weird that they are opening a coffee shop?????? I guess it can join forces with the kpop club and kpop remix rollerskating club in Hongdae. Fun times all around.
Hey Poms, just wondering where you got your visitor counter from?
If you click on it, it brings you to the place where I got it! :)
Hilary Clinton says like an absolute legend. It’s a bit too normal how appearances are criticised and the degree to which such criticisms are perceived as valid.
It always says more about you than me and I’m glad Hilary found the words to explain it coherently.(via fatal-crest)
How much effort would you go to with a guy that you like but you're not sure if they like you back? Eg. He stopped messaging back a few times because maybe there was nothing to say. Would you keep messaging him again?
It depends. I’m very against contacting guys who don’t make an effort to contact me. As in, as soon as a guy doesn’t respond to a message I sent him, I don’t contact him again until he contacts me first. But I’m annoyingly prideful like it’s actually a problem so I never want to give them the satisfaction of making an effort after they have ignored me lol.
BUT for your case if the conversation genuinely stopped because there was nothing to say then I think it wouldn’t a problem to message him again. It depends on the circumstance though. If he consistently is ignoring your messages without ever sending you a message first, I wouldn’t talk to him at least for a little while.
Generally from my experience though, if a guy is interested he will keep messaging you. He might ignore the message if there is nothing to say but a day or so later he’ll probably start a new conversation. Guys are pretty simple I think in the fact that if they are interested they will talk to you.
If I were you, I wouldn’t message him back until he made the effort to talk to you first. But like I said, I just really don’t like giving guys the satisfaction of knowing I’m interested.